The end of starting pitchers is nigh, and it’s all thanks to the bean counters.
Thank you bean counters, the house negroes of their massa, scrimping and saving and streamlining for their greedy owners.
You wanted to get rid of starting pitchers and it looks like you’ve done it. Congratulations.
I can’t pinpoint when this started, maybe it was that scumbag GM in Tampa Bay with his stupid “Opener” bullshit, maybe it was the quant nerds in Kansas City with their bullpen garbage in 2015, maybe it all began with the pseudo intellectual moron Tony Larussa with his match up shell games.
The quant scumbags in MLB have ruined the game, and in the end they’ll only have themselves to blame.
All because of money.
What else is new? In this country of the “Bare Minimum”, baseball is going the way of the airlines. No more meals, no more snacks, no more extra bags, no more pillows, no more blankets… They’re cutting costs, but it’s going to cost them I’m afraid.
Just imagine for a moment if MLB telecasts would black out the pitchers face during the game. Just a black box over his face the entire time he pitches. Just a guy out there, pitching, anonymously, unknown to fans. People would be like what the fuck is going on? Who’s pitching? What is this shit? But that folks, is where we’re headed.
The average innings pitched by starting pitchers has gone down faster than an Alpine skier year by year and nobody cares or is willing to stop it.
All because you faggot scumbag ivy leaguers got into the game. Failed unathletic nerds who couldn’t even make their junior varsity baseball team.
Or maybe it was because Billy Beane-counter let you fucking nerds in.
You don’t want to pay multi-year multi-million dollar contracts to starting pitchers because you only want to save money… You don’t give a fuck about the game.
You don’t want anything to sit “idle” so you invent Uber and Air B&B and “maximize the use of an idle bullpen” because you don’t give a fuck about the game.
You don’t want to see a guy contribute to a team once every 5 days. Every slave must work for his dollar! Fuck you proletariat! You beast of burden! You peasant worker! You don’t give a fuck about the game.
Gee, notice a pattern here?
YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE GAME.
You only want hitters to be famous. Fuck pitchers. You want baseball to be like slow pitch softball where they just lob the ball in to get smashed.
By the way, if you were so hell bent on ruining the game with your penchant for penny pinching, why not get rid of umpires? They are useless now anyway, after all, we’ve already established that… YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE GAME.
But thanks for acknowledging that you don’t know shit about pitching. You cannot identify, develop or appraise starting pitching. You fucking pathetic bean counters are so frustrated, flummoxed, and flustered by pitching. You’re absolutely terrible at it so you want to get rid of it.
Awww, what’s the matter, have you no tolerance for something that you can’t quantify you fucking losers?
Soon there will no longer be starting pitchers because of these quant assholes. It will only be a never ending parade of faceless, nameless arms that nobody has heard of, or even cares about. Isn’t that what you want? Goodbye future Roger Clemens, goodbye future Steve Carlton, goodbye future Sandy Koufax. There’s no room for you in this game, you shall be as anonymous as an NFL team’s defense.
Why does MLB allow bullshit like this? Do they want even fewer players to be recognized? Openers? Lifting starters after 3 innings? Bullpen by committee? This is bullshit by committee.
They lifted Mize on Sunday after 3 innings in a 1 run game! They lifted Brault after 3 innings, AND he had the lead! Does MLB really expect people to bet on this fucking garbage? What’s the use in handicapping games anymore?
Why does the MLBPA allow bullshit like this? Do they not see what’s going on? How are pitchers going to get bigger contracts if they don’t pitch long enough to get credited for a win? Free agent pitchers are waiting to get signed later and later, if at all? Only hitters will get big contracts. That’s OK with them? Get that fucking dumb high school grad Tony Clark out of there. The guy’s a fucking moron. We all know why you got the job you token affirmative action Uncle Tom!
Bye bye Clayton, bye bye Gerritt, bye bye Feces Sabathia we hardly knew you. You had a good run. Now go away and retire like a former stud horse on a farm. Swish your tail while you’re eating hay. Baseball don’t give a fuck about y’all no more.
Thank you bean counters, the house negroes of their massa, scrimping and saving and streamlining for their greedy owners.
You wanted to get rid of starting pitchers and it looks like you’ve done it. Congratulations.
I can’t pinpoint when this started, maybe it was that scumbag GM in Tampa Bay with his stupid “Opener” bullshit, maybe it was the quant nerds in Kansas City with their bullpen garbage in 2015, maybe it all began with the pseudo intellectual moron Tony Larussa with his match up shell games.
The quant scumbags in MLB have ruined the game, and in the end they’ll only have themselves to blame.
All because of money.
What else is new? In this country of the “Bare Minimum”, baseball is going the way of the airlines. No more meals, no more snacks, no more extra bags, no more pillows, no more blankets… They’re cutting costs, but it’s going to cost them I’m afraid.
Just imagine for a moment if MLB telecasts would black out the pitchers face during the game. Just a black box over his face the entire time he pitches. Just a guy out there, pitching, anonymously, unknown to fans. People would be like what the fuck is going on? Who’s pitching? What is this shit? But that folks, is where we’re headed.
The average innings pitched by starting pitchers has gone down faster than an Alpine skier year by year and nobody cares or is willing to stop it.
All because you faggot scumbag ivy leaguers got into the game. Failed unathletic nerds who couldn’t even make their junior varsity baseball team.
Or maybe it was because Billy Beane-counter let you fucking nerds in.
You don’t want to pay multi-year multi-million dollar contracts to starting pitchers because you only want to save money… You don’t give a fuck about the game.
You don’t want anything to sit “idle” so you invent Uber and Air B&B and “maximize the use of an idle bullpen” because you don’t give a fuck about the game.
You don’t want to see a guy contribute to a team once every 5 days. Every slave must work for his dollar! Fuck you proletariat! You beast of burden! You peasant worker! You don’t give a fuck about the game.
Gee, notice a pattern here?
YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE GAME.
You only want hitters to be famous. Fuck pitchers. You want baseball to be like slow pitch softball where they just lob the ball in to get smashed.
By the way, if you were so hell bent on ruining the game with your penchant for penny pinching, why not get rid of umpires? They are useless now anyway, after all, we’ve already established that… YOU DON’T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THE GAME.
But thanks for acknowledging that you don’t know shit about pitching. You cannot identify, develop or appraise starting pitching. You fucking pathetic bean counters are so frustrated, flummoxed, and flustered by pitching. You’re absolutely terrible at it so you want to get rid of it.
Awww, what’s the matter, have you no tolerance for something that you can’t quantify you fucking losers?
Soon there will no longer be starting pitchers because of these quant assholes. It will only be a never ending parade of faceless, nameless arms that nobody has heard of, or even cares about. Isn’t that what you want? Goodbye future Roger Clemens, goodbye future Steve Carlton, goodbye future Sandy Koufax. There’s no room for you in this game, you shall be as anonymous as an NFL team’s defense.
Why does MLB allow bullshit like this? Do they want even fewer players to be recognized? Openers? Lifting starters after 3 innings? Bullpen by committee? This is bullshit by committee.
They lifted Mize on Sunday after 3 innings in a 1 run game! They lifted Brault after 3 innings, AND he had the lead! Does MLB really expect people to bet on this fucking garbage? What’s the use in handicapping games anymore?
Why does the MLBPA allow bullshit like this? Do they not see what’s going on? How are pitchers going to get bigger contracts if they don’t pitch long enough to get credited for a win? Free agent pitchers are waiting to get signed later and later, if at all? Only hitters will get big contracts. That’s OK with them? Get that fucking dumb high school grad Tony Clark out of there. The guy’s a fucking moron. We all know why you got the job you token affirmative action Uncle Tom!
Bye bye Clayton, bye bye Gerritt, bye bye Feces Sabathia we hardly knew you. You had a good run. Now go away and retire like a former stud horse on a farm. Swish your tail while you’re eating hay. Baseball don’t give a fuck about y’all no more.